My dad – the best networker I ever knew
My very first networking event was on an incredibly snowy day in March (I think) 2008 at China Grill. It was a CW-Network event put on by Gigi Bozzano. I didn’t really know what it was or what to expect but I was on her mailing list and had seen the announcement so I decided to sign up. I spent most of the night talking to people and telling them what I did and how sales training could help them (that’s what I was selling after all!) and was generally doing all the things you aren’t supposed to do when networking!
Luckily I met a few people there that I’ve managed to keep in touch with and continue to network with like Jill Houk of Centered Chef, Joe Johnson of Riverside Consulting Group, Toby Nathan of Recruitastar and Stephanie Berger. Stephanie was the last person I talked to that night –she came right up to me, introduced herself, pulled out her notebook and said “how can I help you?” I didn’t know how to respond! What did she mean? I asked her for an explanation and she said “What are you looking for by attending? Who do you need to meet? Networking is about helping people so tell me how I can help you.” Well this was different. Stephanie then went on to tell me about her networking coach, Mark Carter and all he was teaching her. A coach? Now I was even more confused. I left with a promise to get together with Stephanie (which I did) and lots of questions about this thing everyone called “networking”.
Apparently the networking gods felt I needed a little help so a short time later I received an email announcement from Susan Barahia at the BNC about her entrepreneur group – guest speaker, Mark J. Carter. I had to go and check this out! As I listened to the presentation it was as if I had this sudden moment of clarity – this is exactly what my dad did for his entire life – there just hadn’t been a name for it! I asked a few questions and Mark asked to speak with me after the class was over. I thought for sure I was in trouble! Mark pulled me aside and said “I can tell you are one of those people that just ‘gets it’ and I would love to get together with you”. I left with a promise to have lunch (which we did!). Up until that point I hadn’t really understood what networking was or meant but suddenly I knew.
My dad owned two companies in Rockford, Illinois when I was growing up. He sat on several boards at the University of Wisconsin and was even President of the Alumni Association for a term. He was always getting asked to sit on boards, join committees, speak at events, etc. As a child I just knew he was gone a lot, as an adult I realize that not only was he an incredibly well liked man and great salesperson, he was the epitome of what a networker is. I can now remember him planning cocktail parties and dinners where he was very specific about who he was inviting because they were people who should know each other. I was present for several conversations where his response would be “I know someone that can help you with that problem, I’ll just make a call for you”. This was before the internet, before email, just when car phones and cell phones were being introduced and he still managed to make sure the was making connections.
We couldn’t go anywhere without running into someone he knew and he made it a point to really get to know people and remember them. Often after the hello’s were said and the person would leave he would give me the lowdown on who they were, how they knew each other and what they did. His memory for details was daunting and he could pull people from the file cabinet in his brain and remember all the reasons why they should be connected to someone he just met. It was truly amazing. When you are a kid and you say “I really want to go to this concert at the Rosemont Horizon (because that is what it was called back then) and your dad says “oh I know the sales manager, let me make a call” you just think you have a very cool dad. It’s not until later in life that you really understand how big his network was and how often he was helping people.
I lost my dad in November 2008 and it was awful – the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. But through the entire process his amazing ability to network was reaffirmed again and again as I received phone calls, letters, emails and spoke to people that would tell me story after story of how he helped them. I already knew I had the best dad in the world and it only made me more proud to be his daughter to realize that my dad was the best networker I knew as well. This is why networking has become such a huge part of my daily life. When I die I want people to come forward saying “Amy helped me do this” or “Amy introduced me to so and so and because of that this happened”. I want my kids and husband to hear stories from people of how I impacted their life and made it better. I mentioned certain people by name in this blog because they impacted me – they have made my life better. I am still connected with them and friends with them. I had breakfast with Mark J. Carter last week. The connections you make, the networking you do, it can not only help you and change your life but you can make incredible impressions on other people and change their lives. What do you want people to say about you? Who have you impacted and helped today?
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Like Father, like daughter…Bittersweet
Greatly encouraged by your dad’s example